these days i feel like i am sick more often than i am not. nothing works the way it used to. there is always a cough or a wheeze, a back ache, fatigue. feet and ankles ache. stomach is constantly upset.
thoughts turn inward and i have a hard time focusing on how fucked up the world is because i just want the pain to stop.
i turn 41 in a matter of months and sometimes i feel like death would be merciful for not me but everyone i inconvenience with my creaky aching spewing rotting carcass.
but then a debbie gibson song comes on my shuffle and i think well ok